advanced littering

Firework night is over – thank god. Like Christmas, the bangs and sparkles seem to start earlier and earlier every year. I like fireworks – in theory. Ohh Ahh Lovely. In the same way that I think veal tastes nice, but when you start thinking about it, our bizarre celebration of a failed terrorist attack leaves a nasty taste in the mouth.

The Norwegian calls fireworks displays ‘advanced littering’ and you can see his point. Today we need to think about the resources we use and the impact that this use has on our environment. From that point of view fireworks have little to redeem themselves.

And there aren’t many other activities that lead to widespread, burning and maiming of children on a yearly basis. If fireworks were invented now, they’d be banned in a flash of a rockets tail.
To ban fireworks night, then, seems the only option.

We are also considering banning Christmas. Wrapping paper – what a waste.

Bah humbug.


  1. It’s as if you have been reading my mind! But then Toni will tell you that of my four distinct personalities, Virgil the grumpy old man is the most prominent!!See you both real soon. xo

  2. nothing to do with the fact that I was maimed by fireworks as a child (of course I use the word maimed for effect, but my fingers really really hurt)

  3. What do Norwegians call crackers? As they seem to epitomise the ‘advanced littering’ + Christmas all rolled into one…

  4. I initially read that as ‘advanced loitering’ and thought it was going to be about the stairwell prostitutes again. Nice phrase, though :)M-C: ‘Localised advanced littering’?

  5. we dont actually have crackers in Norway, but ‘localised advanced littering’ is a good description… or explosive trash container

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