We’ve all been there. Using facebook when we’ve had one or two light sherbets. The next day you feel a tinge of embarrassment, but then you move on.

Well one of the lesser known pitfalls for the psychotic woman in the twenty teens is the dangers of facebooking while hallucinating and delusional.

In Week Six when I was psychotic (God it still feels weird to say that out loud) I was all over facebook like a rash, convinced of many wild and weird things. I thought I had the power to make particular photos go viral by tagging various people to them, and that I could crash facebook by repeatedly putting full stops in various peoples’ status update comments.

By the way various people, sorry about that.

I remember messaging two kids I went to school with twenty years ago, both of whom, I haven’t spoken to since I was sixteen and who, I was convinced, had superpowers and were best friends with Barack Obama. I remember the messaging but don’t remember what I’d said. I’d deleted the messages.

But facebook cunningly lets you see email trails, even if they have been deleted. First you have to message the person involved and, not surprisingly, I’d been putting it off.

But one of them sent me a happy birthday message the other week and I thought – f&ck it – and sent him a hello.

And then…

*CRINGE*

It was pretty much as bad as I thought. When you read it, bear in mind that I haven’t spoken to this guy since we left school.

Do you dare me to try the other person?