Author Archives: JenSWight
you can stand under my umbrella
Yesterday someone hit me in the head with their umbrella. I was walking fast, in an eastwardly direction along Oxford St, and she was walking, again fast, westward bound. Somehow she managed to get me in the temple with one of the plastic goboons at the end of a spoke. ‘What the…. Jesus,’ I said […]
advanced littering
Firework night is over – thank god. Like Christmas, the bangs and sparkles seem to start earlier and earlier every year. I like fireworks – in theory. Ohh Ahh Lovely. In the same way that I think veal tastes nice, but when you start thinking about it, our bizarre celebration of a failed terrorist attack […]
thinking outside the box
Yesterday the blessed council replaced our stolen recycling bin. Why someone would steal one when they are so readily available is beyond me. I mean it only took us five emails and two months to get ours replaced. (deep breaths, calm, calm) So I woke from my stuffed nose slumbers to find a bewildered Irish […]
rock the boat and stone the crows
This week I’ve been pondering what makes a stone a stone, a rock a rock and a boulder a boulder. Or to put it another way, when does a stone become a rock? My first thoughts – size does matter. To my mind a stone is apple sized and smaller. A rock is bigger than […]
mutton dressed as spam
I know it wasn’t my special day or anything, but I was one of the bridesmaids and so I thought, well I better make an effort. I normally feel like a little girl dressed up at weddings, never quite able to get it right, as if I’m wearing someone else’s grown-up dress. I would describe […]
Jen S. Wight 